Dear Professor Brad,
I hope that you are well and in the
pink of health. It has been a pleasure to sit in your communication skills
module. Your lessons were engaging and has been very insightful. As a timid and
shy 1st year student, of the Mechanical Engineering course, I really
benefit from this communication skills module.
I am writing to introduce my
humble self. I graduated from Nanyang Polytechnic in 2021 with a Diploma in
Biomedical Engineering. My interest in engineering developed during my
internship. The 6 months internship in a medical manufacturing company made me
realised my strength and aptitude towards engineering. I was in sync with the
idea of promoting and manufacturing medical products.
I believe that communication skills are essential in our daily lives and plays a part in leaving behind an impression of our intelligence. I strongly believe that my strength in communication is my confidence. I seemed to gain confidence from experiences doing public speaking to the point where I can speak confidently of a topic that I am not very sure off. I also learned that when you are confident, audiences will believe you. However, my weakness in communication which I hope to overcome is my lack of vocabulary. I wish to learn more synonyms as a personal improvement to sound more knowledgeable. I extremely wish to stop using Singlish as well, this is a bad habit of mine.
I have two goals in mind that I hope to achieve during communication lesson. First, I want to relearn all the skills and materials that you are teaching. This allows me to learn things that I was weak at and also things that I didn’t even knew. It is the learning mindset to be excited and gain all the knowledge that you going to teach. Secondly, I would want to pay attention to how you speak, you as in Professor Brad. This is because I feel that you are a role model for me to listen to and apply how you speak in class for my communications.
What differentiates me from the other students in the class is that I am an all rounder. Name it all, well at least most of it. I do sports, I play instruments, I’m into real estates, I love shopping, I participate in competitions often, I’m a leader too.
I hope you enjoyed reading! It was nice meeting you professor Brad. I can’t wait to learn as much during your lesson !
Thank you Professor Brad!
Hello Irdina! Thank you for sharing your letter with us! Reading your letter really makes me feel like I've gotten to know you a little better. I really like how you presented yourself! However, I believe the letter would be even better if you could write about your communication strengths and weaknesses alone with some examples.
ReplyDeleteYan Ning
Dear Irdina,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your letter! I feel that it is nice to have you asking about our well-being at the start of your letter.
I have spotted some errors in your letter as well. In paragraph 1, there is a concise error in "really shy", "really" could be removed. Paragraph 2, "realised" and "towards" are grammatical errors. For paragraph 3, "I personally prefer to handle commercial or corporate sector rather than residential." can be written as "I prefer to handle the commercial or corporate sector rather than the residential sector." to be more concise. Lastly, it would be better if you could tell us more about the things that are unique and special about you for us to know you better!
Thank you for sharing!
Regine
Hello Irdina,
ReplyDeleteThank you for writing this introductory letter.
Your letter has a good flow and definitely included a lot of information about yourself. I've definitely known a lot about you that I would not have found out just by attending class with you. However, one area you can improve on can be elaborating on what this strength and aptitude towards engineering are.
Lastly, I look forward to working with you in the upcoming weeks of this module. All the best!
Dear Irdina,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this letter. You certainly provide lots of info on your study and work background and in your interests and goals for the module. It's fascinating to learn that you have lots of job experiences. I only wonder what communication strength and weakness might have popped up during your work. Tying communication needs to one of those work experiences would make it very real i the mind of the readers.
In terms of language use, this letter is quite fluent with a few minor exceptions:
1. verb tense
-- Your lessons were engaging and has been very insightful. > (inconsistent)
-- made me realised > (verb form) ?
-- This includes listening attentively, learning new skills and knowledge. > (lack of parallel structure) ?
2. overuse of caps
-- of the Mechanical Engineering course, > ?
There is one interesting phrase in your reflection:
-- the pink of health: I don't this phrase but it sounds descriptive. :)
I look forward to reading more from you this term.
Cheers,
Brad